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My Preloved Life Blog

My husband died 2 years ago, it was an incredible 46 year romance and getting over his death was a challenge. This blog is all about how I dealt with his death, the strategies I used, the tools I discovered, the opportunities I embraced and the new preloved life I have built. My Blog is divided into Beginnings, Helped Me, Solo Life. and Sixty Days.


Featured
When Life Goes in a New Direction
Nov 24, 2021
When Life Goes in a New Direction
Nov 24, 2021

Imagine getting a call from ITV News saying they’d run to interview you about your Airbnb experiences. I was happy to help, Airbnb has certainly played a big part in my life helping to overcome loneliness and filling my home with light. This is the story of what happened

Nov 24, 2021
NLP - Great Strategies For Change
Nov 24, 2021
NLP - Great Strategies For Change
Nov 24, 2021

NLP training is great way to learn new life strategies. An added bonus for me is that I made some great friends on the training course too.

Nov 24, 2021
How Journaling Saved Me
Nov 24, 2021
How Journaling Saved Me
Nov 24, 2021

I really enjoy writing in my journal, last night I wrote 14 pages about the Ipswich Spill Festival . Find out how my journals have helped me.

Nov 24, 2021
Moscow, End of the Line
Nov 24, 2021
Moscow, End of the Line
Nov 24, 2021

This series of blogs was written in the Summer of 2017, I wanted to bring them into MyPrelovedLife to remind me of the wonderful adventures I had travelling 20,000 miles around the world, feeling safe and loved by so many people. Travelling across the entire length of Russian, through Siberia to Moscow, end of the line for me.

Nov 24, 2021
On Board the Trans Siberian Express
Nov 24, 2021
On Board the Trans Siberian Express
Nov 24, 2021

This series of blogs was written in the Summer of 2017, I wanted to bring them into MyPrelovedLife to remind me of the wonderful adventures I had travelling 20,000 miles around the world, feeling safe and loved by so many people. Travelling across the entire length of Russian, from Beijing through Siberia to Moscow

Nov 24, 2021
My Beijing Life
Nov 24, 2021
My Beijing Life
Nov 24, 2021

This series of blogs was written in the Summer of 2017, I wanted to bring them into MyPrelovedLife to remind me of the wonderful adventures I had travelling 20,000 miles around the world, feeling safe and loved by so many people. Cycling in Beijing, close to the Forbidden City and climbing the Great Wall of China

Nov 24, 2021
Shanghai Friends and Culture
Nov 24, 2021
Shanghai Friends and Culture
Nov 24, 2021

This series of blogs was written in the Summer of 2017, I wanted to bring them into MyPrelovedLife to remind me of the wonderful adventures I had travelling 20,000 miles around the world, feeling safe and loved by so many people. My fourth country, China, Shanghai

Nov 24, 2021
All At Sea
Nov 24, 2021
All At Sea
Nov 24, 2021

This series of blogs was written in the Summer of 2017, I wanted to bring them into MyPrelovedLife to remind me of the wonderful adventures I had travelling 20,000 miles around the world, feeling safe and loved by so many people. Sailing from Osaka through the inland Japanese sea to Shanghai was wonderfully cathartic

Nov 24, 2021
Miyajima, The Most Photogenic Place on Earth
Nov 24, 2021
Miyajima, The Most Photogenic Place on Earth
Nov 24, 2021

This series of blogs was written in the Summer of 2017, I wanted to bring them into MyPrelovedLife to remind me of the wonderful adventures I had travelling 20,000 miles around the world, feeling safe and loved by so many people. Visiting the magical temple of Miyajima

Nov 24, 2021
My Pilgrimage to Hiroshima
Nov 24, 2021
My Pilgrimage to Hiroshima
Nov 24, 2021

This series of blogs was written in the Summer of 2017, I wanted to bring them into MyPrelovedLife to remind me of the wonderful adventures I had travelling 20,000 miles around the world, feeling safe and loved by so many people. Visiting the Peace Memorial in Hiroshima

Nov 24, 2021

Loving Hands Massage

November 23, 2021 in Helped Me

Remember the words of the U2 song, I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For?

Well, I think I have found what I’m looking, at least for now.

It all started with a foot massage I had from a male therapist in Azerbaijan. When I returned to the UK I decided to look for a male masseur near me.

I found Sam, a masseur based in Bury St Edmunds but who travels to clients homes. Sam specialises in Hawaii LomiLomi massage which translates to Loving Hands.

I was rather nervous waiting for him to arrive, what if I don’t like him, what if he’s too firm. I was full of uncertainty, after all this was a new venture and in my private space.

I needn’t have worried, it was a truly remarkable experience. Sam arrived promptly at 9.00 AM on Saturday morning, with his massage table, room heater, essential oils and a bag of colourful sarongs.

In Hawaii, LomiLomi is typically given at the beach where it's hot, 30+°

It’s not like regular massage and doesn’t involve set sequences, right leg first, then left leg and then lower back. Instead, the therapist works intuitively using arms, hands and elbows with sweeping movements that travel all across your body. That’s why you don’t wear any clothes, only a thin loincloth to cover your modesty.

While I was lying on my front, Sam started the music and began chanting an Hawaiian prayer. He asked me to breathe in deeply three times while he placed his hand on my back. I immediately felt we were breathing in sync.

Sam told me that the sarong with its colourful fringes arranged at the top of my back would be pulled over my body and that I was to imagine waves washing on the shore as the sarong left my body. And there I was naked in my lovely purple lizard lounge, the room hot and the air thick with the heady smell of coconut oil, ylang-ylang and essential orange oils.

I could feel myself relaxing deeply and after about 30 minutes I turned onto my back.

The long sweeping movements now over the front of my body were especially enjoyable, I imagined my whole body being painted in gold. I have no idea why that thought came into my mind but it felt right.

I’d booked a 90-minute massage which included 30-minute reflexology and a facial. I normally like a light touch but Sam's massage technique on my feet was firm and that was just right too. He was just so intuitive.

He massaged my face with frangipani oil, an extract from the beautiful Hawaiian flower, the scent was heavenly, the moves divine.

My 90-minute massage was just perfect and exactly what I was looking for. I’ve missed intimate male energy and the experience of being touched all over made me feel whole again.

Sam told me I had a strong aura. I’m not quite sure what he meant by that but I’ll find out next time I see him. Yes, I’ve already booked a follow-up session in April. I’ve invited one of my friends to come along too, my gift to her for all the fabulous support she’s given me over the last 2 years. I hope she likes it too.

I was told to rest after the massage, do something enjoyable. I read for a while and then fell asleep. When I woke up I had to walk into town to pick up some groceries and as I walked down the high street I felt as if I was floating. I felt whole, connected and beautiful.

I don’t want to be too woo-woo but I was looking for someone like Sam, and I found him, I'd only been back from Azerbaijan for less than a month. So it felt like a small miracle had happened, finding Sam.

The practicalities were that I used a service called BARK which lists local service professionals or in my case, male masseurs.

Sam responded to my requested straight away and after a few text messages, I'd arranged an appointment. I never read any of his testimonials or visited his website, I put my trust in the Universe and it turned out to be a positive experience.

I went outside my comfort zone, for sure. I’ve never had this kind of massage before or even had someone come to my home. But the result is that I now have a regular male masseur who can come to my home.

Sam's LomiLomi massages and his caring holistic approach to his work are just perfect for me right now.

If you’d like to book Sam, here’s his website

If you live outside the area you might find your own male masseur here www.bark.com

Don’t you agree that human touch is so important and can be difficult if you’re not in a relationship?

I’d love to know what you think.

#MyPrelovedLife : 3/4/19

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